«Buy Belief now!»

You believe in something don’t you? I mean there has to be a cause or belief that everyone stands for. Even if you claim not to, that’s a cause or belief that you stand for.

Now, have you ever been to a rally or function that supports that cause or belief? Well I have and I know how you feel afterwards. First of all you are pumped up about your belief or cause. You feel the need to share your thoughts about your belief or cause with everyone around you. Then that pumped up feeling turns to guilt. You feel as though you are not doing enough for your belief or cause because you’re not up on stage doing what these people are doing… or you are not donating enough money… or living exactly as the ideal person would who believes in your belief or cause. So then you get depressed a bit. You start to look at your life and you wonder… can I change who I am to fit with the ideal? How can I be a better believer or supporter?

Over the weekend my wife and I went to a concert/silent auction that supports my wife’s beliefs or cause. So when we were there she got pumped up… she felt guilty that we were not giving all of our money to this belief or cause… and finally she got depressed when we got home because she felt she was not living like her ideal belief or cause.

I know how she feels… I’ve been there… several times… in the end you go back to what you did before with a slight change towards the ideal. I know I’ll never be the ideal of my beliefs or causes… and I don’t worry about it… too much… but I go on with my life and I don’t worry those around me….

Some days I think she’ll leave me for her belief and/or cause… she’ll tell me it wasn’t me… that it should have been like that always… and I will be expected to understand it and accept it… I won’t accept it… or understand it… it’s not how it’s supposed to be… but this is America… the land of easily broken promises… all I know is that I’m not going to break my promise to her. She will have to break it before I will… she will have to justify that broken promise to me long before I even consider breaking mine. I refuse to be unhappy however… I will do my best to ensure that we are both happy in our relationship.

I’ve heard of 2 broken promises in the last week… there’s a 3rd one that I’m sure will happen soon because the woman in the relationship is just not happy and the man in the relationship doesn’t seem to want to change the situation. All three of these promises involve children… They are the ones who will be hurt the most by the lack of communication and willingness to change that appears to have occurred and continues to occur in these relationships. They will be the ones affected for life and either continues the cycle that the parents have set forth… or breaks free and spends his/her life wondering why their path will work when their forbearers’ path seems to be the only one that “works”…. When does the cycle end?

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